Ahhh...summer. It's finally here. The time that all of us wait and work towards all year. There is something about the summer that breathes relaxation. I find myself at incredible peace in continuing in this journey and adventure I am on.The year has brought many different stresses of life: work, moving, being away from those I love, etc. The summer has somehow breathed life back into me in many different ways.
One of the things about moving all the way cross country is that I have been forced to build and create something different away from all that I have created the past 24 years of my life. This has proven to be a big challenge. Moving, as I had hoped, has brought me to my center and looking inward as to what I hope to create for myself moving forward. Everytime I visit home, I always tell people that my life back east is all about my friends and family. It is about social events, parties, gatherings and obligations and all that was my livlihood. California, is soley about me. It is about learning to be on my own, learning to turn inward when I have no one else to turn to but God and myself. I have pushed and pulled and writhed and lost sleep over trying to "figure everything out." The voices playing in my head are extremely frustrating, but what I found is that the harder I try to figure it out, the less things fall into place.
I had a professor that always used to tell me this. "Hallie, stop trying to figure it out!! Let your life reveal itself to you." Yeah, right. I thought the exact same thing as you probably are thinking right now! What the HELL does THAT mean? Reveal itself?! That is a load of bull, if I've ever heard it. The past few months however, this concept has continued to remind me of those classes I sat in back in college. With not a huge social network, working from home, not many obligations in California, I was finding this whole "reveal itself" concept to be an entire load of crap.
All that changed about a month ago, when I decided to focus on what is most important in this whole equation: me. Life is so busy sometimes, and so filled with so many obligations we make to one another, to our partners, to our work, to our family and friends, we forget to take care of ourselves and take moments to relax and just BE. Let me personalize, I forget to take care of me. Lately, I have started focusing on eating really healthy, eating more fresh fruit and vegatables, drinking more tea, more water, reading books of interest, spending more time at the ocean, excercising/dancing as much as possible and my biggest venture was signing up for a sprint triathlon on October 10th benefiting the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society!! (donate here: http://pages.teamintraining.org/los/HermosaT10/hpopex sorry, that's my only plug)
I have been sleeping through the night (which was a problem for several months). I am more relaxed during the day with less anxiety and overall in a peaceful state of mind. I think I have realized that people will only learn to treat you the way you want them to, by the way that you treat yourself. If you take care of yourself first, while allowing others to happen to you and continue to stand your ground, the result can only be positive. We are the only ones responsible for how we percieve our lives and how others treat us. So, lead by example, and remember to set time aside for you and only you. The only person you have control over, is yourself.
